Week 2: Loving Kindness Meditation
- Formal practice this week: 10 minutes of sitting meditation daily
- Focus this week: loving kindness
Happiness happens from the inside-out.
Welcome to Week 2! We hope you enjoyed finding the breath in Week 1. This week, we will work on practicing loving kindness meditation. My hope for you is to cultivate happiness, compassion and positive energy while overcoming negative thoughts you feel towards yourself or others, such as jealousy, anger, guilt, fear, suffering or anxiety. Quite simply put, everyone wants to be happy in life. Happiness though is not an end goal you set, obtain, or achieve. It’s something already within each of us, something we need to awaken and work on from the inside out. Practicing loving kindness meditation will help us tap into this.
Loving kindness meditation has origins in Buddhist tradition and stems from the concept of fear. The story says that the Buddha sent monks to a forest to engage in mindfulness and meditation. When they got there, they grew fearful after hearing strange noises and seeing scary spirits. The Buddha taught them loving kindness meditation when they returned and sent them back info the forest with this new skill. After the monks practiced loving kindness in the forest, the spirits actually ended up being friendly and the monks stayed for a long time in harmony with the spirits.
For this meditation, we will silently repeat phrases first aimed at ourselves, then outwards towards particular people, and finally for beings everywhere.
I love that just like with the breath, this practice is incredibly portable. When difficult situations arise that stir emotions such as anger, fear or sadness, access your phrases in the mind and bring loving kindness into your heart.
Also, just like being with the breath, this mediation technique takes practice. You may feel opposed to sending positive energy towards yourself or others. You may not feel very loving or kind on certain days, or as you just are starting this new practice. Just be patient and remember to keep going forward. Understand your negative thoughts come and go, they don’t have to make you who you are. You are not your thoughts. Release yourself from your judging mind and reground yourself to the present moment.
There are many versions of these phrases in loving kindness meditation, but the ones below are ones I practice and live by. If you prefer a different set of phrases, or find a different line arises in your practice, that is perfectly fine. Make this your own and feel free to tweak it as you please.
“May I be safe & protected”
“May I be happy & healthy”
“May I be loved and live with peace”
__________
Let’s Begin!
Just as we did with the sitting mediation focusing on the breath, we will begin our loving kindness practice in a similar position – sitting on the floor, in a chair, or upright in bed. You can lay down if that feels most comfortable, just be cautious to not fall asleep. Straighten the back, bringing the crown of the head toward the ceiling, allowing for easy expansion of the lungs. You can tilt the chin slightly toward the chest if that feels right. Relax the shoulders down your back. Let your arms rest wherever you please. Soften and close your eyes. Feel the connection with the earth – your knees and ankles touching the ground, your bottom on a cushion, your feet flat on the ground or your hands on your knees.
Starting with yourself – repeat the phrases:
“May I be safe & protected”
“May I be happy & healthy”
“May I be loved & live with peace”
Embrace the self-compassion and positive energy.
After a few minutes, after repeating the phrases a few times, or whenever it feels right, shift your focus to a loved one in your life. This could be someone you’re close to or someone that has inspired you in your life. Maybe a person you’ve connected with deeply. It could be a partner, mentor, parent, best friend, or sister.
Thinking of this special person – repeat the phrases:
“May you be safe & protected”
“May you be happy & healthy”
“May you be loved & live with peace”
When you’re ready, shift your focus to a neutral person. This could be someone you see daily, but don’t really interact with. This person might be hard to come by. Try thinking of a distant coworker, neighbor, or coffee barista.
Extend loving kindness to this neutral person by repeating the phrases:
“May you be safe & protected”
“May you be happy & healthy”
“May you be loved & live with peace”
When you’re ready, shift your focus to someone that’s more difficult in your life. This could be someone you don’t quite get along with or someone you may not enjoy being around. See what happens when you send this person loving kindness. This is where we grow internally. My hope is that you will notice something, maybe not right away. But remember – these things take practice.
Extend loving kindness to this difficult person by repeating the phrases:
“May you be safe & protected”
“May you be happy & healthy”
“May you be loved & live with peace”
Finally we expand our well wishes outward, wherever that may be. Go where your thoughts and energy take you. Your family. Friends. Those suffering with illnesses or the heroes supporting them. Those maybe needing love and encouragement. Wish them safety, happiness, good health and peace.
Extend loving kindness wherever your mind takes you by repeating the phrases:
“May you be safe & protected”
“May you be happy & healthy”
“May you be loved & live with peace”
Side notes:
Some people prefer to start with someone other than themselves, which is perfectly fine. You might find it easier to wish yourself these good vibes after extending it to someone else first.
Also, this is flexible! If your mind wanders to a group of people instead of one person, let it be. You don’t need to force this. Follow your heart with this practice and go where it takes you.
